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Day 9 – Paris to St Ives

Due to the wine consumed and the earliness of the hour we didn’t exactly spring out of bed but we managed to drag ourselves down for breakfast and get out of the hotel by 9. Trying to tick all of the boxes in the limited time available we headed straight up to Montmartre and hiked up the hill to take in the impressive Sacre Cour basilica. Then we headed straight back down again and back on to the Metro to see the cathedral of Notre Dame. From a distance, Notre Dame doesn’t really look particularly impressive, but when you are up close the many sculptures adorning the facade are really quite amazing. Even better are the intricate stained glass windows when seen from the inside with the light streaming through them.

With only a couple of hours left before we had to leave the city, we strode along the banks of the Seine to the magnificent Louvre gallery (or is it a museum?). We entered through the glass pyramid made famous by that awful Dan Brown nonsense and after battling with some broken ticket machines typical of the French efficiency we had experienced at the Eiffel Tower we got in and raced round a few rooms. Naturally, we sought out the Mona Lisa and the Venus de Milo as well as a few rooms of amazing ancient Greek and Roman sculpture, enormous Italian paintings, and Egyptian artefacts.

At 3.00 we caught the Metro back to Port Orleans and, after stopping at a patisserie to flex our collective linguistic muscles and order sandwiches and cakes, we go the car from its multi-storey and pointed the nose at Calais.

An uneventful 3 hour drive on smooth roads later, we pulled up at Carrefour to fill every nook and cranny of the Daimler with wine and cheese – it was so loaded up that the headlights were clearly pointing skyward and the rear suspension hit its bump-stops over the fist sleeping policeman outside the supermarket.

We managed to blag our way onto an earlier ferry than we had booked and headed back to Dover. Despite the water being as calm as a mill-pond (although it was raining), Ian won the prize for the feeblest voyage ever as he turned a nasty shade of green and made Si stop the car just outside the ferry terminal so he could turn the harbour water a nasty shade of vomit.

Two hours later we pulled up outside the house, knackered but pleased to be home. Thinking how annoying it would be to lose the 80 bottles of wine and 10 cheeses we had hauled home, we made a final Herculean effort to unload the car before going to bed.

The final day's pictures are to be found here.

So there it is, 3200.5 miles, 135.2 gallons of petrol and 10 days later we are back where we started.

Day 8 – Geneva to Paris

We jumped out of our (surprisingly comfortable) Suitehotel beds at the usual 7.00 and sped into Geneva in the Daimler to pick up some breakfast at a bakery. After we had filled up on cakes and coffee we wandered round for a couple of hours and found ourselves thoroughly under-whelmed by the city. It is not particularly beautiful, especially after Florence and Milan, and doesn’t really seem to have a sense of identity or any real buzz. We took another look at the big fountain and got back in the car to pound up the motorways to Paris.

After a smooth – and highly tolled – drive up to Paris, we checked ourselves into the Hotel Orleans and the Duchess into a local car-park. We went straight out to see the sights and got the Metro across town to the Arc De Triomphe and Champs Elysses. We couldn’t get right under the arch as veterans were celebrating some of the great French military victories of the past.

We wandered around the corner and along the banks of the Seine to the Eiffel Tower and after bypassing the trap of an official looking gentleman telling us the tower closed at six, queued up for half an hour to gain access to the second floor viewing platforms. The system at the tower is clearly absurd as we then had to queue for another half an hour and buy a second ticket to get the lift to the top. It was worth the wait though as the views across Paris in the sunset were superb. See photos here.

After a similarly long wait to get back down to the ground, we consulted the map and decided it was a short walk over to the St Germain district for some supper. After walking for well over an hour, we finally arrived in the Latin Quarter absolutely starving and sat down at the first place that looked half decent. Luckily, it was half decent (the wine especially) and we had a good meal. As it was our last night, we decided to go back to the Port Orleans area where we were staying for another bottle of wine. Splendid.

Day 7 - Milan to Geneva

An uneventful night for Team XJ3 at Hotel Tiffany. Simon was snoring like a jack-hammer, we had the odd mosquito or two and the obligatory early morning’s start, though both Simon and Ian managed to sleep through Matt’s raucous alarm at 7:00, so we postponed our very own “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” until after 7:30.

A rather funny moment to kick off as we came downstairs. We left our parking spot last night to go to the pizza restaurant (through the red light district, it seems) and promptly lost it on our return. We were obliged to use the hotel’s pay-parking, especially as the off-side rear window had failed half-way down, leaving us prone to losing some of our precious, precious Travglini wines. We didn’t pay last night, so on checking-out this morning, the nice Italian hotelier asked us if we had paid for the garage, to which we harmonised a firm negative, for Simon to take further saying he’d actually rather not. The trouble with hotels, he claims, is that they make you pay for stuff that should be free (Notably car parking, and especially wireless internet access- S). It seemed to work, she didn’t actually fancy trying to make us pay so we just walked out, which was nice (incidentally, Simon managed to fix the window, so there’s no chance of a random Swiss person helping themselves to our Italian goods).

We took a quick trip into the Milan town centre, saw the splendid 15th Century castle first (I only know this because we tailed a tour guide for a few minutes) and proceeded onto the Gothic Duomo (two Duomos in two days – not bad going), the outside of “La Scala” theatre and a brief coffee to take in the many Milanese sights.

We decided to stop en route to Geneva for lunch so we piled into the Duchess and pointed her up the A4. We parked up in Aosta at 3 and decided to have a quick look around the shops before, seeing as it was our final calling point in Italy, having another pizza.

After this we pressed onto Geneva, first crossing the border into France via the Mont Blanc tunnel. The approach to the mountain itself was spectacular, with fabulous views of the Mont and surrounding peaks in the Grand Massif visible with a small amount of cloud. Simon was quite trigger-happy on the old digital camera, so there should be plenty of images for you to view in today’s update of our photobucket account.

A brief trip through France and we popped across to Geneva and found the “Suitehotel” where we are now with a minimum of fuss and even managed to see the famous fountain (the tallest in the World) on the way. The hotel managed to slightly mess up our booking – two of us almost had to share a double bed, but that was soon sorted on the promise that we didn’t touch anything in the original room. I don’t know what she expected us to have done in the two minutes we’d been in, but there you go. We’ve braved the public transport system already this evening, popping into the city for a brief look around and a quick meal - an Italian! Join us tomorrow for what promises to be an interesting trip up to Paris for our final night.

-I, M & S.

Day 6 Photo Update

Follow this link to see out pictures from Day 6.

Day 6 - Florence to Milan

Last night we enjoyed the most superb meal of the holiday so far. We found a place called Perseus a few minutes' walk from the hotel, which had a very encouraging queue of Italians outside. Inside we were treated to an enormous slab of beef, cooked really quite rare, and served with roast potatoes and a high-protein green salad (Ian found a caterpillar wriggling around in his portion - the waiter seemed to think it was a sign of freshness but gave us some free Limoncello anyhow). We washed the lump of cow down with two bottles of excellent wine.

This morning we rose far too early again, especially after Ian had spent most of the night roaming the room in his underpants to hunt down the plague of mosquitos that were attacking him in well-ordered droves. Simon and I suffered a few bites but they really took their revenge on Ian who has 16 bites, including 4 on his forehead.

After breakfast we wandered into the historic centre of Florence and hunted out the Duomo, the huge cathedral in the very middle. Even though it wasn't Sunday we felt the urge to go inside and dragged ourselves up the 490 steps to the very top of the dome. If there really was a god, he would have ensured they put a lift in the dratted building. After stepping over crowds of Americans passed out through exhaustion we enjoyed spectacular views across the whole city - pictures to follow when we have wifi for the official XJ3 laptop instead of a 286 with a dodgy keyboard in a hotel lobby.

We lunched on ice cream and panini before pointing the sat nav at Gattinara and driving the 250 miles to the north of Italy. We arrived at the Gattinara winery to discover that they expected us on the 27th of October, but the owner deigned to give us the tour anyway and took us round the fermenting room and cellars before kindly letting us try some of the finest wines and even more kindly letting us buy too much of them to take home. There is now no room in the Duchess for Simon's suitcase which now has to occupy the rear seat.

Speaking of the Duchess, we fear she is beginning to shut down more and more random electrical systems the further north we drive. The air con now works for 10 minutes(and 5 fuses) a day, one of the windows won't open and one won't shut, and the oil pressure gauge can't decide whether or not we have a problem. The rear wheel bearing is now louder than the engine, but on she plods for now - only another 1000 miles to St Ives.

We checked into our hotel on the Milanese outskirts and went for a cheapo pizza and beer. Early night now, ready to start exploring the city in the morning before the drive up into Switzerland. No mosquito hunting tonight, thanks to splashing out on a hotel with air conditioning. Luxury.

Day 5 Up Pompeii (then up Florence afterwards)

We got up far too early today. Last night there was the most amazing thunderstorm rattling around directly overhead and at one point in the night the thunder was so unrelenting it sounded exactly like there was a Harrier Jump Jet hovering directly outside the window. Anyway, the combination of that and the alcohol from the night before made getting out of bed a miserable proposition.

We had arranged to nip down and help the Spitfire guys out with their car buy giving them a haynes manual and generally encouraging them along, but they must still have been in bed because they were nowhere to be seen. We met up with Team 18 who were busy exchanging the exhaust pipe on their Saab with one that was intact but on a car that was going to be scrapped. Actually the doomed Saab was in the process of being ripped apart by other S2Ners in the quest for parts so we joined in and took a few 15A fuses for the Dutchess’s air conditoining clutch. On average I’d say we’re getting about 100 miles or 1 hour per fuse. That’s not ideal but the Saab gave us enough fuses to last for a couple of days we hope.

Pompeii was our stop-off point on the way to Florence and we also volunteered to give one of the press guys a lift to Naples Airport. They were right to warn us against going in to the town, it as very congested and the most chaotic place we’ve been to yet. We got in and out in about two hours and arrived in Pompeii at about 11:30.

We found a parking space close to the entrance and paid an enthusiastic Italian con-artist €5 for the privelege of using it. He was probably not a genuine parking attendant as we bargained him down from €8 but he was so enthusiastic about the Daimler that he deserved a fiver anyhow.

We trod the streets of the Pompeii Excavations for around three hours, dodging tour parties and hoards of school-children whilst we took in the amazing 2000-year-old houses, shops, forum, amphitheatre (of Pink Floyd fame) and other buildings. Pompeii is basically an entire city and afer wating around for a few hours, it jolly well feels like it an’ all.

At 3 o’clock we decided to grab some pizza before setting off to Florence but a series of bad tempered waiters told us that there is nowhere in New Pompeii selling pizza after three PM so we found a peculiar looking bar and had a sandwich there instead.

The drive to Florence took three and a half hours on clear roads. Italy’s A1 – like our own, the spine of the country – is a fabulous drive that winds through all the hills and mountains of each region from Milan down to past Naples. The driving is generally speedy and the scenery is often breathtaking.

Off out now for some food and wine and we’ll attack the sights of Florence in the morning.

Here's a link to today's photos
.

Bumper Picture Update!

Due to us finding a Wireless access point in Florence, here are the photos of:

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

The S2N Party

Yesterday was the end of S2N. Most teams managed to get to Naples one way or another and there were a lot of English bangers lined up in the carpark in Castel Volturno. We didn’t drive into Naples itself because to do so is apparently extremely unwise. Even the local population advised us against it!

The big news is that unfortunately Team xj3 did not win any prizes, we were very much in the running but some rather bad luck in the final challenges caused us to place just outside the prizes. Damn. Prizes were awarded for winning the most points in the challenges, the best themed car (Andy and Lou from Little Britain: they even did the photograph challenge on Day 3 in costume, complete with wheelchair), the longest hitchhike (from Calais after their Ford’s gearbox broke!) and the best bodge (something about using Parma Ham to repair an automatic gearbox).

There were two bits of bad news during the evening: we never saw the pink Volvo belonging to the four girls and it turned out that the Jaguar XJ-40 that had been painted in RAF livery, complete with a model spitfire bonnet mascot had suffered a catastrophic rear wheel bearing failure and it looked unlikely that they would be able to continue to Munich with it in the morning. We really loved the thought of an RAF Spitfire car driving through Germany. There was another Jag that was available as a donor so there is a slight chance that the Spitfire will ride again.

During the evening, many of the bangers found new owners with Italian teenagers who then proceeded to rag the hell out of them until they broke. We were asked several times if we intended to sell the Dutchess but of course we would not part with her to any Italian. She deserves much better than a certain death in a foreign country. One of the Italians also tried to drive into the side of her in his new car as we were on our way back to our hotel, but due to her 4.0L engine and a sports button we soon had her away from danger and into the safety of out Holiday Inn carpark.

We spent the rest of the evening in the hotel’s bar with all our S2N friends and two travelling American IT Administrators who were on a trip through Europe and made the mistake of asking “So, what are all you English guys doing here...”.

So for the third night running, the English turned up and drank until there was no beer left in any of the nearby bars and then staggered off to bed. Brits abroad, eh?

Day 4 - Viterbo to Naples

Here it is - the news you have all been waiting for - we have actually
made it to Naples! We bowled up here in comfort and style (and in the
pouring rain) at about 4.30; actually one of the first to arrive for a
change.

We started out from Viterbo at 10:00 after having been given half an
hour to plan our route to fulfil today's challenges. Challenge 1 was
to find a specific newspaper vendor in one of five named towns;
Challenge 2 was to follow a set of fairly obtuse directions and
photograph certain points along the way; and Challenge 3 was to go to
one of five towns and decipher a picture clue in order to take a
specified photo. We did pretty well but made a couple of errors -
naturally we are blaming the ambiguosity of the clues for any of our
failings. We will find out who won the challenge in a few hours' time
- we have been told that we are very much in the running, but we're
not confident.

One real breakthrough we made today was learning how to drive the
Italian way. Anybody who tells you that the Italians are bad drivers
are simply not entering into the spirit of the thing! The basic
principle appears to be that you go at whatever speed you deem
appropriate: if someone wished to pass then past they go and if you
wish to boost past somebody else then they will happily sit three or
four abreast in the road as you fly through.

We are still updating the blog by e-mail so can't post pictures. As
soon as we find a cheap or free wifi network we'll treat the faithful
readership to a selection of the very best in holiday snaps.

M, S and I

PS, Welcome to a Blog Of The Day! This blog has apparently been added
to Blogoftheday.org - it looks like our readership has expended
somewhat! Welcome to all of the new readers, please don't forget to
sponsor us at www.xj3.co.uk. Cheers...

Day 3 Aprica to Viterbo

The day started with a meeting at 9:30 - part of today's challenge was
to dress as Reservoir Dogs Characters so the suits were donned and
supersoakers filled before breakfast. One of Aprica's town squares
was reserved for S2N bangers and as the teams arrived a huge water
fight ensued until Justin turned up to announce the start of the day's
challenge proper.

The challenge required us to photograph ourselves, complete with
supersoakers and suits at pump 3 of five petrol stations along the
way, in the company of at least one native Italian. We soon teamed up
with Team 18 again (who helped us yesterday) and the photographs
ensued. Probably the best photo was the last one, in the company of
about 6 Italian ladies who we found in a service station. Apparently
bonus points are available for inventive photos so let's hope we get
some!

The actual driving was a real pleasure - a blast at 100+, er, KPH??
down the autostrada, a brief stop for lunch and then press on for
Viterbo. We arrived at about 6:15, WHILE IT WAS STILL LIGHT! Yes
Team 51 was in the first 10 cars to arrive so we feel justifiably
proud of our efforts.

PS Sorry for the lack of photos and belated blogging, it appears that
Italy is some way behind the Internet revolution! This is being sent
from Simon's XDA phone! Photos to follow.

Day 2: Sarnen to Aprica

An eventful day all round.

We left the rather wonderful hotel (well, certainly when you hear
about our hotel in Aprica) at about 9ish ready for a good slog up and
down the Swiss Alps, taking in the Grimselpass, Furkapass (or
Sustenpass / Oberalpass, depending on how brave we felt).

The former route also included "La Tremola", a cobbled mountain pass
that was replaced by the Gotthard tunnel - allegedly one of the
longest in Europe. After a wrong turn, we actually ended up taking in
half of the two routes just mentioned, doing the Grimsel and
Furkapasses, but completely bypassing La Tremola by doing the
Oberalpass afterwards. As it happens this was a rather fortunate
mistake to make.

After leaving Chur (sidenote: absolutely full of very good looking
women) and setting to our daily image challenge, today's being trying
to match photos taken on our digital camera to snippets of pictures
taken by the organisers, we noticed a certain lack of 'pull' in the
engine and a bit of a backfire.

What happened next was a blaze of panic, stress and unbelievable luck.
Not 20 minutes after having broken down, up comes a stream of fellow
S2N'ers who pull up, including Team 18 (more on them later) and the
Grassy BMW teams. Amazingly, the co-driver in one of the BMWs was an
ex-Jaguar mechanic who decided to lend us two hours of his time to
take a look at what was wrong. He got out his latex gloves and had a
good feel around, cleaning up various contacts, sensors and what-not
(including a couple of calls back to the UK to Ian Button and other
contacts) until, finally, us calling the RAC. We decided to give it
"one more go."

It worked. Unbelievably whatever our friendly, neighbourhood Jag
mechanic did, it did the trick, so off we toddled towards our final
destination, still a good hour-and-a-half's drive away in fading light
and conditions. Obviously, by now we had completely given up on our
image challenge, but after some fast snapping (necessary due to some
fast driving!) we managed to snap 15 of our 20 images and cruised
behind Team 18 over a few more Swiss passes into Italy and got to
Aprica pretty much last (again) at around 8:30.

However, on arrival it soon became clear that our booked hotel was not
'optimum'. It had been closed for two months until we fetched up in
town so the place smelt of damp and the hot water was brown! Errrrr.
It didn't affect our sleep though.

-I, M & S

Day 1: Coquelles to Sarnen

We woke promptly at 7am, due to not having got too pissed the night before, and after a quick breakfast of mainly plastic-type food set off for Citi Europe shopping centre, the start of the rally.

We were given free choice of which route to take, the only proviso being that we had to fetch up in Sarnen, Switzerland, by the end of the day. Naturally, not being shy to wrestle adversity by the horns, we chose take the '5-country' option: France, Belguim, Luxembourg, Germany, Switzerland.

Today's challenge was 'Staples2Naples I Spy' - take a digital camera, choose a starting letter and photograph as many objects on the way that start with that letter as possible. We chose C, which proved a very fruitful letter indeed. Our eventual score was 90 objects, after we were disallowed Chav, Chinese and City. We DID manage to sneak Cripple with Carer, Codger in a Coat wearing a Cap and Cheese Shop through though. Woo.

The Duchess is averaging 25.7 MPG and we purposely chose a stint on the German Autobahns (yes, like we had a choice -I.) and she galloped up to 120mph before a strance smell of steam trains purvaded the cabin so we slowed down. There is still a slight coolant leak and an increasingly-noisy NSR wheel bearing but we're not worried, she's purring along nicely.

Apparently we're currently in the lead, points wise, despite being almost the last to arrive in Sarnen, due to the '5-Country' approach...

We have also bought the most expensive bottle of wine in Switzerland, despite asking for House Red. It appears House Red in Switzerland is Red wine that cost about as much as a house.... Gosh. Still it tasted nice and we're currently on cheap lager instead.

Please excuse the uninventiveness of today's photos. We were concentrating on photographing as many C things as possible and you wouldn't want us to lose on your account, would you?!

Day 0: St Ives to Coquelles

We have made it to our first overnight at a delightful Hotel B&B in Coquelles, a 'village' near Calais.

Incredibly, we set off on time at 8.30 with no technical difficulties whatsoever.

However, after arriving at Staples Corner after being stuck in London traffic for an hour or so the technical difficulties had begun to develop...

After mopping up the puddle of coolant and staunching the flow, we realised that the air-con had also packed up. In searing heat and with the windows down (it was surely the hottest day since July) we made it down to Dover in record time and were put on an earlier ferry than we had booked where we met up with a couple of other S2Nners.

The pair followed us in their trusty Saab as we went round in circles outside Calais looking for a hotel that wasn't mentioned on any signposts. We arrived finally and checked in then with a final flourish fixed the air con (it was only a blown fuse...).

All we need to do now is find Justin in the bar, check in to the rally and order a bottle of wine.

To see the pictures, visit Our Photobucket site

M,I&S

XJ3 Have Left The Building!

It's early and I don't really do mornings, but I'm here to tell you that we're about to leave.

First stop is Staples Corner, where we've got a date with the press then it's off to the ferry for 14:25.

And if you're thinking of breaking in and helping yourself to our guitar collection while we're away think again! We've invited a mate to stay and look after the house, so I suggest you go as a pair, one of you keep him talking at the front door, while the other breaks in at the back.....

We'll keep you updated!

We're ready!

Yes, it's true we have finally fixed that starter motor problem by buying a new connector and another length of wire. I've worked out that you can achieve a lot by climbing on top of an XJ-40 engine - it gives you a lot more access to hidden bits and bobs.
Anyway, with that fixed, the Beast had a wash, and window clean, we also checked the fluid levels and tyre pressures. We then affixed all the stickers that Just Digital gave us for that "rally-car" effect.

All the spares and tools are packed in the back, along with the supersoakers that arrived this morning.

So to Naples it is. The car's ready and all we have to do is pack, oh, and arrange some european breakdown cover, and arrange travel insurance, actually there's quite a lot still to do but at least the Beast is all set.







Simon.

And it's Broken Again.....

God damn it!

Fixed for one day and it's broken istelf again!

It's that pesky wire to the starter solenoid. For some reason I can't get it to stay put. I made the mistake of crimping the female spade clip a bit to prevent it from coming off again.

Actually, I managed to prevent it from going on ever again.

Every other XJ-40, and my XJ-S, for that matter, which has basically the same engine, has a ring terminal which is BOLTED to the starter solenoid. Why does my car have to have a spade fitting that I can's see or get anywhere near, except with the tips of my fingers...?

I'm off to the local car shop tomorrow to get a new spade connector to which I'm going to attach a length of new wire, then once it's satisfactorally attached I'll join it to the existing wire which is pissing me off so much.

On a brighter note, Just Digital have come up trumps with some new door labels and a windscreen banner, so it's not all bad. Even if it won't start, at least it'll have a few large number 51s emblazoned on it.

Until tomorrow.....


Simon.

The Beast is Finally Ready!

Success!

The Daimler is now ready for the off. Matt and I re-wired the stereo this afternoon and can now declare it fully working. For now.

Just Digital are hopefully going to have prepared the new stickers for our doors, bonnet and tailgate and I'll pick them up on Tuesday.

Tomorrow is a big day for me - it's my IAM (Institute of Advanced Motorists) driving test so if I pass I can go to Naples as an advanced driver. I'll know some time after 18:30. Wish me luck!

I have to admit that I eventually wimped out with the Daimler's wiring - I shall never know why the interior illumination fuse kept going, as I have run another +ve wire from the battery, via a fuse, straight to both 12V feeds for the stereo. That'll show it. Blow that fuse you bugger!

The only other thing that we await is our supersoakers. They'd better be here before Tursday.

Simon

The Beast is Ready! Well Nearly....

Today was indeed a significant day for our Daimler.

I was up early to fit two new wheels and tyres to the front and also replace the radio aerial. All parts were given to us by Jagbreakers in Manchester and have been in storage since I went to visit them some time ago. One of the teams from last year advised us that having decent tyres was a must as they'd had several blow-outs. It also turned out that on closer inspection our spare had a huge chunk of metal sticking out of it so we now have good tyres all round and a good spare.

Today was also the day that I'd set aside to go to the scrappy and get all of the bits that we were still lacking:

Rear window switch
Boot Lock
Hose set
Various trim items
Fuses

Matt came with me to Mildenhall where there are several scrappers and after we'd gutted parts out of two red XJ-40s a full set of parts was acquired.

This afternoon was spent fitting everything to The Beast and by about 6pm we'd fixed the central locking, boot lock, electric windows and radio. Well, so we'd thought!

It worked for about 20 miles before the interior illumination fuse went, taking the radio with it. Damn! So that's one for tomorrow then. Work out why that keeps happening and if all else fails re-wire the radio on its own fuse so we can still have some music if the interior lighting craps out.

It's annoying me though - why the hell does that fuse keep going...? I may have an answer for you tomorrow.

Simon

About time for an update!

We're fewer than ten days from departing the UK for Naples and a lot has been happening!

Where to start?

Well, The Beast now has an MoT, FINALLY.... Special thanks to Ian Button Cars, Ltd for help with this. It needed:

New rear suspension bushes
Rear Brake overhaul
New Windscreen


The beast also had a few other problems that are now ironed out:

Leaking headgasket
Leaking coolant hose
Leaking oil cooler.

The special thanks to Ian Button is for helping us (continually...) and also answering all the stupid questions we had to ask about the car and its engine. He oversaw the replacement of the cylinderhead gasket and has helped us out in so many ways.

We now have no oil leaks whatsoever and everything is nearly as it should be.

That's not to say that there haven't been any brown trouser moments though.

I came home yesterday and decided to fix a coolant hose that the RAC had repaired some time ago by using a plastic tube and a couple of jubilee clips. It was a complete swine of a job to replace the hose because the original hose clips were put on in such a way that it was nearly impossible to get to the screws.

Anyway, about three hours later the hose was replaced and coolant retopped up so I tried to start it and make sure that there were no air bubbles in the water system. So I stuck the key in the ignition and turn it.....NOTHING! About 160 relays, motors and solenoids seem to arm themselves but there was no actual engine tuning over happening.

Damn it. Fewer than ten days to go and I've broken our chariot! a bit of investigation revealed that a wire had been dislodged from somewhere:

Thanks to members of Jag-lovers.org I soon found out that I'd removed a wire from the starter motor and fixed it in about 5 minutes this evening. Thank God!

So before we leave the following still has to be done:

Make the electric windows work
Find out a way of locking the boot
Replace the radio aerial

And most importantly: fit a working radio!

Peep-Hole Hosery, Heat, and Crack

It was an eventful weekend for the poor old Daimler after I decided to favour it (and its air conditioning) over my 23 year old Austin for the cruise down to a party in Kingston on Saturday. At the bottom of the A1M a mysterious red light came on and, thinking red probably meant bad, I swung into South Mimms services to investigate. The owner’s manual was conveniently situated in Simon’s bedroom, so I had no idea what the light meant but I thought it looked more like an expansion tank than anything else and decided to investigate. The coolant level was indeed a touch low so I topped it up. And topped it up. And topped it up a bit more. After guzzling 3.5 litres of South Mimms finest Volvic, the level of coolant had remained stubbornly the same and I soon discovered that this was because it was rapidly forming a large green river under the car.

The RAC were summoned (after a lengthy discussion with the call centre about whether I was or was not actually a member – turns out that for the first year since 2000 my membership had not automatically been renewed…) and chirpy Cockney Tony was dispatched to stem the flow of coolant. He cut out the gaping hole in the hose and neatly joined the two halves, refilled the system with a gallon or two of water, completely failed to reconnect the air-con hose he had unplugged for access, and we were on our way to arriving at the party a mere four hours late.

Returning home the next day, hung-over and crabby (made even more crabby because it was about 30 degrees in the shade and Tony had skilfully disabled the air-con), I was slightly dismayed to see the same little red warning light come on as we cruised past South Mimms (could it be that the place is cursed? As a child, I once fell out of a car onto my chin in that very same service station). Another call to the RAC, another chirpy Cockney chap (Ian this time) dispatched in an orange van, and another joint put in the perforated hose (it now looks somewhat agricultural with 12” of hose joined in two places). Despite Ian’s assurance that his repair is solid enough to get us to Naples, I think we’ll be replacing this hose ASAP, and acquiring some spare hoses to take with us from the generous Jag Breakers (one of our sponsors).

Driving home from the second repair I was just reflecting that it could be worse; after all, coolant hoses are easily replaced and the air-con will probably work again one day. Then I noticed a large crack slowly working its way up the windscreen… Bugger.


..Matt..

Spot the Ball to Win a Cake..

Malcolm, Beccy, Kate and Matt, Dave's taking the pic.

News just in: some mates in the Marketing department where I work have come up with a novel fund-raising idea: being as it's a golf company they are running a 'spot the golfball' competition, with the prize being a cake baked by Team XJ3. So far only one person has paid up and refused to pick a square to ensure they don't win the cake. Honestly how rude!

I'm just off now to find my Vicar of Dibley cook book which has details of Mrs Cropley's cullinary delights... I particularly like her Marmite cake ;-)

Oh, and in return, I have allowed the Marketeers a spot on the car to do with what they will. It's already sporting an 'I'd Rather Be Driving a Titleist' sticker at their request. It's a close-run thing but for the record I think I prefer driving the Daimler. Just.

Simon.

And Then There Was More Light...

Ah, XJ-40 Electrics!

Our latest fault has been that the right hand side headlight had stopped working. Both filaments stopped at once and the bulb failure warning came on on the dash, as you might expect. Too much of a conincidence that both filaments should go at once, eh? Must be a failure of one of those pesky (and extremely unreliable) relay modules.

So, out I take it and examine it carefully and it appears to be toast. All sort of marks on the PCB, dodgy solder joints - it was a miracle it ever worked in my opinion. The bulb looked brand new and was clearly not at fault so I put it back in the headlight fitting..

Anyway long story short, the black box was not at fault, it *was* the bulb after all so another thing learned. I really should have tested it with the multimeter but I couldn't be bothered yesterday. Silly Billy.

So, we have light again, and at least it gave me the opportunity to check the earths and clean up a few things in the engine bay. I also gave the old girl a wash and cleaned the windows in celebration.

On a lighter note (no pun intended!) I wrote to Marshall Jaguar today in search of sponsorship. We'll see what comes of it...

Simon

What People Say About Engines.....

The more people you talk to about jaguars, the more conflicting opinions you get. These opinions seem to fall into two general catagories:

1. "At that mileage it's just run in" - regardless of mileage
2, "Shhhh, that sounds expensive - I reckon that head/block/diff ets's scrap"

Well I've been taking advice about our oil leak and the funny ticking sound that we get when the engine's cold and on Friday a mate was talking to a Jaguar Specialist in Peterborough:

The oil leak from the head gasket just above the distributor (just like yours) is extremely common on the 4 ltr engine. Apparently there is an O ring in the head gasket that seals around one of the pressurised oil passages. This O ring moves slightly and allows the oil to leak. He has seen many of these at a variety of mileages. His suggestion was to leave it alone unless it is leaking a lot of oil or is too annoying to live with. His reason? He reckoned that replacing the head gasket is not a difficult job, but tends to be one that turns into a much bigger job than planned. Expect several of the exhaust manifold studs to shear off in the head, also do not be too surprised if a head bolt shears off during removal. Once the head is off, having done 170,000 miles expect to be shocked at the state of the valves (burnt) and the amount of wear on the cam shafts. Bingo! Unless you are sufficiently strong willed to put the head back without further attention, a simple head gasket replacement just turned into a top end rebuild! Could you put a worn out head back on?

The ticking noise was a bit of a surprise (well it surprised me). All I told him was it happened when the engine was cold but under a hard load, and it sounded 'tappety'. "That'll be the exhaust", Clive says without a moment's hesitation. "Oh?", says I, "what bit?".
"The manifold. Either it'll be cracked or, more likely, the gasket between it and the head has failed or one of the studs has come loose or sheared off. Take the stainless steel cover off and have a feel around for a blow when the engine is cold. If it's just a loose stud you can sometimes just carefully tighten it up a bit.

The thing is that we can't really have it dropping oil all over the place so I think taking the head off it is inevitable - I really wonder how knackered it can be. The mileage is very high but it has been on the back of an auto box for all that time and by most accounts the AJ6 engine is capable of 250,000 miles before an overhaul.

We may well see....

Simon

Small faults fixed ... major fault discovered

I had to cruise down to the south coast in the green beast this weekend so I felt it was time to rectify a couple of small faults. The rear windscreen has been making quite a racket at motorway speeds and a bit of investigation (i.e. pulling the seal off) showed that this was because it was the least-bonded bonded-windscreen around and was liable to be sucked out at any minute. As glass is structural and not to be messed with, I rang the local auto-glass company and they sent one of their 12 year olds round in a van to re-bond it.

We also decided - as we know a friendly young chap at the local garage who does this sort of thing for pocket money - that it was time to get the rear offside directional tyre pointing in the right direction, on the off-chance that we might coax an extra mile-an-hour (or, even better, mile-per-gallon) out of the barge.

While we were there, we asked a sympathetic mechanic for his view on the oil leak that has been troubling us and he confirmed our suspicions - the head gasket needs replacing before Staples to Naples or we will wind up stranded somewhere half-way up the Alps. A can of Wynn's Leak-Stop has staunched the flow for now but, since the choice is replace it ourselves or pay £850 for a garage to do it (there is nothing more expensive than a cheap Jaguar), we will be commencing a major engine overhaul just as soon as the weather catches up with the time of year. Great.

Matt

That oil leak... And another thing!

The strange thing about the oil leak is that although oil was dropping out of the car, the level wasn't dropping on the dipstick. Also, our engine oil is mucky, sludgy stuff whereas the oil collecting on the subframe was beautiful clean golden virgin oil. Turns out that the PAS system on the XJ-40 is filled with HMSO oil rather than the stuff that is deemed to be good enough for all other cars on the road - hence the golden hue.

Anyway, being as it's not gushing out I couldn't see where it's coming from until I cleaned the engine block, which is what I did today. Spent an hour of so with a paint brush, engine de-greaser and a high-pressure hose underneath the block and also from the top, into the engine bay. It's all clean now so I'm waiting until tomorrow to see where the oil is coming from. There was a slight brown-trouser 'oh-no' second when it wouldn't start after the cleaning but a brief drying of the coil and distributor solved that problem. And I haven't broken any of the electrics today. Not a warning light to be seen anywhere.


I also took the Daimler on a bit of a jaunt out into Suffolk today, just for the hell of it and have found another little problemette: at speeds of anything over about 60mph, there is a wind-whistling sound from the rear windscreen which gets worse and worse with speed. I investigated the window and was surprised to be able to pull the seal off with my fingers. Hmmm, loooks like there's nothing holding our rear screen in place! I think I'll be gluing it in before it gets sucked out by air pressure.


Simon

The next bit of maintenance

We've put quite a few miles on the Daimler over the past 10-or-so days. We should have invested in a communal Jaguar much earlier. There really is no better way to arrive somewhere than in a pipe-smoking, slipper-wearing person's car. I must admit to being rather taken with it.

So far it's been relatively trouble-free but there has been a little oil mark developing on the drive and today it got a lot worse. It seems to be coming from the front right of the engine block so needs some investigation this weekend unless it's snowing, or in any way cold.

Must check that our trolley jack is man-enough to raise such a beast of a car off the ground.

Simon.

Disaster Averted (for now)...

Got the handbook out this morning. Would you believe that the XJ-40 has FOUR fuseboxes?!

What bothers me is that fuse C1 is for the Radio and it was fine. C2 should be a 7.5A fuse and is for the interior lights but it was a 15A one instead and in blowing had taken out the radio. Work that one out...

Miraculously enough the radio code was present in the car's documentation and we are going again. It bugs me that the radio stopped working because the fuse for the interior lights fails. Oh, also that the fuse should have been a 7.5A one and was 15A instead, but still blew! Still on the positive side, Fuse B4 didn't go. That one's for the Central Processing Unit (CPU)! Why does my car need a 20A fuse for a CPU?! That's a 240W processor.

I can't say I wasn't warned about the XJ40 and its electrics.

Simon

Disaster!

We have lost radio contact. The first tragedy has befallen our supposedly trusty steed. Driving home from work today - purely to become accustomed to the car, of course, not because it is so much more fun to drive than my knackered old Austin Maestro - a terrible thing happened: Radio 4 clicked off and couldn't be encouraged back by any amount of knob twiddling.

As if the loss of Radio 4 wasn't bad enough, the trip computer and interior lights have also ceased to be. Just electrical gremlins, of course, but we'll have to add it to the top of the repairs list as it just isn't the same drive without Brian Perkins' soothing voice.

Matt

Whoop! We have our S2N Ride. And it's a Daimler!

As this is the first post, I'm guessing you're wondering how organised we are, right?

Well the presence of a website is a good start, but I always said I wasn't going to start in earnest until we got ourselves a decent motor.

Last month I put a cheeky advertisment in the Jaguar Enthusiast monthly magazine basically saying 'I want to buy your XJ-40 for £100'. As it happened I got a really good response and ended up with a 1992, 170k mile Daimler 4 litre with from a kind chap in Stockport called Kieran (on the right in the picture) who requested that I give the £99.99 for the car to our charity.

So that's what I did today. You can see the progress on JustGiving.com.

So as it stands, we have a car that is basically a go-er with MoT until July and a few jobs to do to get it ready for September.

Simon.