Peep-Hole Hosery, Heat, and Crack

It was an eventful weekend for the poor old Daimler after I decided to favour it (and its air conditioning) over my 23 year old Austin for the cruise down to a party in Kingston on Saturday. At the bottom of the A1M a mysterious red light came on and, thinking red probably meant bad, I swung into South Mimms services to investigate. The owner’s manual was conveniently situated in Simon’s bedroom, so I had no idea what the light meant but I thought it looked more like an expansion tank than anything else and decided to investigate. The coolant level was indeed a touch low so I topped it up. And topped it up. And topped it up a bit more. After guzzling 3.5 litres of South Mimms finest Volvic, the level of coolant had remained stubbornly the same and I soon discovered that this was because it was rapidly forming a large green river under the car.

The RAC were summoned (after a lengthy discussion with the call centre about whether I was or was not actually a member – turns out that for the first year since 2000 my membership had not automatically been renewed…) and chirpy Cockney Tony was dispatched to stem the flow of coolant. He cut out the gaping hole in the hose and neatly joined the two halves, refilled the system with a gallon or two of water, completely failed to reconnect the air-con hose he had unplugged for access, and we were on our way to arriving at the party a mere four hours late.

Returning home the next day, hung-over and crabby (made even more crabby because it was about 30 degrees in the shade and Tony had skilfully disabled the air-con), I was slightly dismayed to see the same little red warning light come on as we cruised past South Mimms (could it be that the place is cursed? As a child, I once fell out of a car onto my chin in that very same service station). Another call to the RAC, another chirpy Cockney chap (Ian this time) dispatched in an orange van, and another joint put in the perforated hose (it now looks somewhat agricultural with 12” of hose joined in two places). Despite Ian’s assurance that his repair is solid enough to get us to Naples, I think we’ll be replacing this hose ASAP, and acquiring some spare hoses to take with us from the generous Jag Breakers (one of our sponsors).

Driving home from the second repair I was just reflecting that it could be worse; after all, coolant hoses are easily replaced and the air-con will probably work again one day. Then I noticed a large crack slowly working its way up the windscreen… Bugger.


..Matt..